To Leave To Return
by mamaduck1870
Summary: 2nd Zibbs fic! Spoilers for Season 10! Est. Zibbs. Ziva has to return to Israel to bury her father and Gibbs has to stay in D.C. When Ziva returns, she's reminded of what is truly home. Ch. 10 is up!
1. Chapter 1

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**Author's Note: Oneshot, major spoilers for Season 10! You are now warned! Completely Zibbs, centered around Eli David's death. I intended for this story to be a oneshot, but if reviews want a part two, it can be written. :) So just let me know. :) Also, ****Zicacentric****'s WONDERFUL story "Never Alone" was the first inspiration for this story. It is a great story and I recommend it to all Zibbs shippers. :D**

**Disclaimer: NCIS is not my property, nor do I intend for it to be.**

**Summary: Ziva has to leave for her father's funeral. Which also means she has to return to D.C.**

**Rating: T (Safe!)**

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Ziva finds difficulty in speaking to Tony before she left to bury her father.

Finally deciding to just give him a hug, she hears him tell her she's not alone and responds, before walking away from him and to the plane.

What Tony didn't know was that Ziva didn't have tears in her eyes because of Tony or her father. No.

She had tears in her eyes because she didn't want to bury her father alone.

The man she wanted to join her had to stay in D.C., he had to do his job.

Leroy Jethro Gibbs always finished what was required of him.

They had been seeing each other for about two months and things had been taking their natural time.

Gibbs and Ziva both agreed that the last thing to do was rush things. And they didn't. Pacing themselves, keeping this from both the team and Leon Vance, truly finding out things about the other, their relationship was going quite well.

And it all stated because of her father, actually.

Gibbs and Ziva were the only two left in the bullpen, finishing up case reports late one night.

And something in Gibbs made him ask before he realized what he was saying:

"Do you love your father?"

Ziva's head is spun and violently brought out of the case detail she's typing. They had been working in a comfortable silence for almost two hours and when Gibbs finally decides to speak, it is about her father?

She tries to form words but is so stunned at his choice of conservation, she's not sure how to answer him honestly.

Ziva can feel his eyes on her and knows she has to say something. Looking into the space of an empty floor in front of her and struggles with answering to say the least:

"I…well…I am supposed to love my father. It is what daughters do."

Gibbs knew he put her in one hell of a position. He didn't know his mouth was going to run off on its own and make things awkward:

"Doesn't mean you do."

Ziva's temper was quickly rising and it was heard in her voice:

"Why do you want to know?"

She now looks at him and wants to know what concern of his it truly is. They never had these discussions and when her father had been mentioned in the past it was always in passing.

And right now, she didn't care how sharp she sounded, she wanted to know why he was suddenly so interested:

"Just curious."

And after that, he left.

From that conservation spurred several more about several topics and before they knew it, they were going out to dinner.

And now?

Well now, Ziva was walking onto the plane that contained both Schmeil and her father's body.

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Jethro Gibbs flashed back to when Bodnar was going to Tony's apartment, when he, McGee, and Tony had all thought he was going to hurt Ziva.

The stab of pain that went through his body at the thought both then and now was strong and gripping.

When he found that Ziva was the only one there and when he had been informed that Bodnar never showed, he instantly turned to Tony and told him to call McGee.

Tony turns away from them and though Gibbs fought off the urge to take Ziva in his arms, he did touch her shoulder as he spoke to her gently. He wanted to keep her grounded, let her know she wasn't alone.

Snapping back into the present, he still couldn't believe he was were he was.

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As Ziva grabs the olives from the olive tree that was rooted as deeply into the Israeli soil as much as she had been throughout her life, she knew Jackie Vance's funeral was today.

And she knew Jethro and the team were in attendance, paying their respects.

Ziva didn't think her father's presence would ever cause this much damage. And now two people were dead and there was a murderer on the loose.

Her stay in her home country was a lonely one, a stay where she missed Jethro.

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Standing, looking over the guests and family members in attendance, Gibbs found his mind going back and forth between the funeral for his boss's wife and what he thought Ziva was doing.

Gibbs loved her and he knew leaving was what she had to do to gain some kind of peace from the whole situation.

Ziva David had to bury her father.

Yet Gibbs still missed her, still wanted to know and see for himself that she was safe.

He knew logically he couldn't leave right now, Gibbs had to get his team in order, they all had to focus on the tasks at hand.

But the yearning and longing he felt in his gut to tell her everything was going to be alright almost overpowered his common sense.

He knew Ziva would be back soon, but it wouldn't feel like soon enough until he could hold her again.

Gibbs hadn't told Ziva he was in love with her yet, his gut would tell him when the time was right for that.

He would tell her, he would take that risk.

Because Ziva was worth it.

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Planting the olive tree in the soft Earth beneath her fingers, Ziva knew this was a final goodbye for her father.

She had done this very same thing when Ari had died, or rather when Ari had died from her bullet.

Thinking back to that day, Gibbs had gently touched her hand before he left his own basement, giving her a moment with her brother's lifeless body on his floor.

Even then Gibbs and Ziva had a connection.

So now, she's miles and miles away from him and she doesn't feel alone.

The trip had been more than a little emotionally draining and Ziva was looking forward to returning to D.C.

There was work to be done and contacts to call about her father's death. When her glacne returns to the olive tree, she knew she did what she had to.

Burying her father had not been easy and the fact that Bodnar was the individual responsible for all of the new found tragedy made her blood boil.

But if there was a name, the name could be traced and Bodnar would be found.

Ziva would make sure of that.

And she knew Gibbs would have her six.

Wiping the blade off on her coat sleeve, she looks at the land that surrounded her.

Ziva stands and with one last look at the olive tree, she walks away.

She leaves her father, her brother, and her birthplace.

She's going to her work, her lover, and her adoptive home.

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Ziva drove to Gibbs' house faster than she normally would have. She called him and told him she was back and they both wanted to see the other.

Parking her car in his driveway, she didn't care right now if she was caught at his house. She wouldn't stay the night and if she did, she could always move the car.

Right now she just wanted to see Jethro and make sure they were both okay.

Walking into his house via his un-locked door, she goes to the basement first and finds him there.

Descending the stairs, Gibbs has stopped sanding and moves closer to her.

Now on the same level, Ziva stands in front of him for a moment, not saying or doing anything. She shuffles her feet and hears Gibbs' voice:

"Ziver…"

She looks at him and nods, then goes to him slowly, and hugs him gently.

Gibbs smirks and brings her into his chest tighter, having missed these over the past few weeks. Even before her father arrived, the cases had piled on and their moments alone had gotten to be fewer and fewer.

For a few long moments, they each stay in that position, not wanting to let go.

Ziva felt thinner to Gibbs, no doubt having a loss of appetite due to emotional stress.

Letting her go, he cups her face and presses a gently kiss to her lips, not wanting to go too far. Gibbs know she's still vulnerable and pushing something on her right now was not what she needed.

He breaks the kiss and looks at her, checking her over. He sees a weak smile on Ziva's face and she leans in for another kiss, this one a little deeper.

When that kiss ended, Ziva returns to her position of being in his arms, her head on his shoulder.

As they stand in the basement of the one and only Leroy Jethro Gibbs, both he and Ziva knew that there would be a lot to handle at NCIS over the next few months.

Questions would be asked and the answer to those would only cause more questions.

But right now, Ziva was back.

Back where she felt safe.

Back where she felt loved.

Back where she was wanted, and where she wanted to be.

And that was with Jethro Gibbs.

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**Would you like a part two? Or would you like for it to stay a one-shot? :)**


	2. Chapter 2

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**Author's Note: Here is Chapter Two! Thank you for the reviews and let me know if you would like a third chapter! I really appreciate all the followers are readers, you're all awesome!:)**

**Disclaimer: NCIS is NOT my property.**

**Summary: Ziva's found in a kitchen and Gibbs wants her to talk.**

**Rating: T (There's something here, not too bad, promise!)**

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Gibbs didn't quite know what to think at this point. Ziva had gotten back and when she did, she went straight to him.

For that he was glad. It went without saying that her father's death had been Hell on her and until she got her revenge, it would only get worse.

But there was a strong possibility that with him around she might not fall so hard. Then again, he could just make things worse.

When he wanted to move them from his basement to his bed, Ziva made it up about two stairs. And then she slipped and fell back into him, which jarred Gibbs into action.

Coming up behind her, he shifted so he could pick her up bridal style and take them both to bed. Her gasp of surprise did not go un-noticed and he had to smirk at her reaction.

Upon entering his bedroom, he laid her down before getting in behind her. Neither one of them had bothered with the thought to change clothes, needing the other more than pajamas right now.

Before he thought possible, Ziva had reached behind her and taken one of his hands in hers and the quickly drifted off to sleep.

Gibbs laid there for about another hour, his mind spinning over all that had happened. Lying in bed breathing her in, he drifted off to sleep eventually.

However, Ziva had woken before him. Long before him if his kitchen had anything to say about it.

He had woken to an empty bed and the smell of something cooking in the kitchen. When he entered, she heard him but stayed focused on her tasks.

Every possible surface was covered with cooling racks and tins and plates-of cookies. Any place he turned his vision there was some sort of cookie.

Taking this as a sign, he spoke:

"Ziva?"

She turns around from washing the dishes in the sink and leans on the counter, drying her hands on a towel:

"Yes, Jethro?"

Her tone is calm, soft almost. Gibbs took that as a good sign, though he did tread carefully:

"Baking?"

She smiles and sets the dish towel to her right, still looking at him:

"When I saw Abby before I left, she had cookies she had just baked in her lab. She informed me that she thought the smell of anything...fresh baked helped people to feel more kind. And relaxed. I thought she was right. Wanted to see for myself."

Gibbs smirks in his own unique way. It seemed she had baked every kind of cookie she could possibly think of:

"You okay?"

_'Well Hell no, she's not okay.'_

His own voice screams at him in his own head. And her delay of response proves his head's voice is right.

Crossing the room to her, Gibbs stands in front of her, placing his hands on the outside of hers on the counter:

"Talk to me here."

Ziva can't look at him, she just couldn't do it. Though she did speak:

"How many more deaths will I cause? Who will be next, huh? I have already taken out the Director's wife and Bodnar has not been found,"

Her voice met anger and she was extremely frustrated with herself, though she kept going:

"Had I been more focused, more on point, I might have seen it coming, could have stopped pa-"

"Hey."

Gibbs knew this path, knew where the blame of herself would lead her. That was not a place for her. Un-phased by his word, she kept going:

"I could have stopped part, if not all o-"

"Hey."

Gibbs' voice got stronger, he knows he's not getting through to her. And he didn't that time either:

"Maybe if I had listened to my gut, said something, Jackie Vance would-"

"Hey!"

That one caught her attention. Well his slightly raised voice and the emotion caught in her throat.

She looked to the floor, tears were not what he deserved to see from her.

Ziva didn't know what to do with her hands or her eyes or anything really. She knew if she moved anywhere near Gibbs she would more than likely say or do something stupid.

Which wasn't what she wanted to do right now.

Gibbs keeps looking at her, not willing her to avoid this or go through this alone:

"What happened is not your fault."

She snorts and shakes her head 'no' still without looking at him. Mumbling something he can't hear, he leans in closer to her. Saying softly and with care:

"Repeat that?"

Ziva's still looking at the floor, though she does repeat what she actually said:

"I said it _is _my fault,"

Ziva pauses and finally looks into his eyes. She continues:

"Eli was **MY** father and had I done more, changed _one little thing_, maybe Jackie would still be here. I am not sure how to handle that or how even to look at the Director again."

That was more than she thought she was going to reveal. She returns to looking at the floor, apparently very interested in the hardwood pattern.

Standing in his kitchen, surrounded by a few hours worth of cookies, Ziva didn't know what to think.

Luckily for her, she didn't have to.

Gibbs cups her face and makes her look at him:

"You're right. Ya changed one little thing, you might be the one Ducky autopsied,"

Ziva' eyes involuntary widen, she hadn't thought of that. Though she should have, Gibbs continued:

"You and Vance will talk and it'll be okay,"

God she wanted to believe he was right. That everything would work out somehow and that they could put this behind them.

But Gibbs had more to say:

"And you're not handling this,"

Ziva looks at her, a perplexed look on her face. But it didn't last long:

"_We_ are gonna handle this."

Ziva smiles a real smile and Gibbs moved his arms from the counter around her to her hips in front of him.

She moves slow, but Ziva finds herself is Gibbs' arms, hugging him as tight as she could manage. As he simply holds her, a thought creeps to the front of her mind. Saying close to his ear:

"Jethro, I have been gone for days and you have not made a pass at me once since I have returned. Why is that?"

Gibbs smirked and kissed her temple:

"You've been through hell. Thought you'd want time to adjust."

She smiles and pull back so she can look at him:

"I just want time with you."

Her tone is suggestive and his mind goes to _that_ place. But the little voice in his head told him to hang on:

"Soon. You need sleep tonight."

They still had a few hours before they needed to get ready for work.

A few hours of some more sleep before her first day back couldn't hurt and though Gibbs knew she wouldn't admit it, Ziva would need the rest later.

Though Ziva had another comment in mind. Not moving an inch from where she is:

"Okay. But after I get a kiss."

Gibbs smirked, the woman was smart, he had never said any different.

Leaning down, he kisses her gently on the nose, then stands back straight and looks at her. Ziva could only smile:

"On the lips?"

It's a soft question flavored with humor and kindness.

Gibbs looks at her and nods.

Slowly, he leans back to her and claims her lips as his. In a very small, very sweet, very light kiss.

They both now he's teasing her and they're both enjoying the show. Leaning back, the humor in his eyes is only mirrored in his own.

Ziva almost broke out in laughter at his teasing. But she didn't and she tried again:

"You are teasing me Jethro,"

"Mmmm."

He was in complete agreement and he knew she was enjoying it too:

"Would you like for me to ask more specifically?"

"Nope."

Gibbs knew what she wanted and he knew where it would lead. He wanted to take this slow, even if it drove them both mad with impatience.

Taking a single step forward, Gibbs is now completely in front of her and he knows exactly what he wants to do.

Tilting his head to one side his lips claim skin he's missed for these past days. Finding the spot on her neck he had memorized to memory due to her strong response to it, Gibbs makes up for lost time.

The second Ziva feels Jethro's lips on her neck, her body leans towards his, her arms going back around him.

Returning to his favorite path, Gibbs lets his mouth rise from her neck to her ear and then finally to her lips.

Explaining in a kiss how much he had missed her by his side, in his bed, at NCIS, Gibbs held nothing back and gave everything he had in that kiss.

And Ziva left him very happy when she returned exactly what he gave.

Her hands slowly go up his back and find a stopping point in threading them through his hair.

They continue like this for long moments, each not giving a damn about what was happening anywhere else.

When they do finally break apart, Ziva envelopes him in a hug for more than one reason.

Yes, she wanted him close but she also wanted t tell him something without having to look in his eyes. Saying in his ear:

"I have never felt so alone in my entire life than I did on this trip. But when I saw you, I did not feel alone any longer. Thank you Jethro."

As Gibbs heard Ziva's small voice in his ear, his heart tightened at both her words and the meaning that arrived with them.

It still surprised him that she was willing to try to be open with him about anything.

He pulls her tighter to him, not trusting his own voice right now, he knows it's full of un-expressed emotion.

Gibbs knew Ziva wanted to make love, and truth be told so did he.

But tomorrow.

Right now he wanted to hold her through the night.

And his gut told him she wanted to be held just as badly as he wanted to hold her.

Jethro Gibbs was a man who always listened to his gut.

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**Would you like a Chapter Three? :) **


	3. Chapter 3

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**Author's Note: Hi! Chapter three! Thank you for all the reviews! Now, a part of this chapter is rated M. For any readers that do not wish to read M content, you can still read this chapter. I have added a different page break. When you see this (././././././././.) with two rows, you are about to enter/exit a M rated section. The chapter can be read and make sense if you skip that section. Hopefully this chapter is worth the read and thank you for reading! Spoiler alert for 10x13 "HIT AND RUN". You are warned! :)**

**Disclaimer: NCIS is NOT mine.**

**Summary: Ziva has her first case since her return to NCIS. Gibbs sees her at home that night.**

**Rating: M (If you skip that section, the rating is T)**

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Gibbs left Abby sitting on the floor and headed for the elevator.

This case had gotten to her, so much so that she had called in sick.

Today was also Ziva's first day back to NCIS.

She had left before him and he knew she would be at his house, waiting for him. The case had gotten to Abby and it certainly wasn't the one Gibbs wanted for Ziva's welcome home.

When he walked into his house, instantly something was off.

The lights were off.

Why were the lights off?

And why were candles lit everywhere?

What in Hell was going on?

He knew Ziva was here, so his mood relaxed.

Closing the door behind him and putting his keys on the side table, he takes off his shoes and socks. As his feet were beginning to lose some of their pain from his day-today tasks, wonder began to set in.

There was no music on, but when Ziva stepped into the foyer barefoot, dressed in only a black button-up shirt of his, Gibbs had no idea how he kept his jaw off the floor.

Her straight hair hung down around her and Gibbs couldn't form words anymore.

So Ziva did for him:

"Last night, you told me to adjust and get some sleep. And last night I did. So tonight, I would like for you to…keep me up."

Gibbs couldn't speak.

Something about the low light and the beautiful woman in front of him and the words she'd spoken, it was all so alluring.

He simply nods and slowly walks over to her.

Putting both hands on top of her arms, he feels his own shirt cloth under his fingertips.

Ziva doesn't move and her gaze is steady on Jethro.

Unhurriedly, he moves up her arms and gently cups her face. Leaning down, he kisses her lips so slowly that Ziva can't help but keep his pace as she responds.

Not having these moments almost killed her while she was gone.

Killed her.

Bad choice of phrase.

Gibbs breaks the kiss and moves to whisper in her ear:

"Shirt looks better on you,"

Ziva chuckled for her response, even at a time like this Gibbs knew what to say.

He pulled back so he could see into her face and had to speak again:

"Sure you're ready?"

Gibbs cared and he knew Ziva was strong. But given the ordeal she had just been through it would be understandable if _this _was the last thing on her mind. Ziva, on the other hand, knew what she wanted to do and who she wanted to do it with.

So she took a page out of Jethro's playbook and answered with actions rather than words.

Leaning up on the tips of her toes to reach his lips, Ziva dove in and left no room for doubt. The second her lips met his she kissed him as if it was the last kiss she would ever give and Gibbs would by lying if he said he wasn't a little dizzy by the time she was done:

"Take that as a yes."

His breath is practically gone when he speaks and resting his forehead on Ziva's, Gibbs could tell this was what she wanted.

And Gibbs would be more than willing to help.

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They make their way to the couch, Gibbs sitting and pulling Ziva into her lap he stops and looks around.

Fully taking in the surroundings of the candles, Gibbs sees tat they are in large glass containers. If the candles were to completely burn out, the wax would not overflow.

Ziva had planned on being distracted tonight:

"You did all this?"

He knows her legs are fully exposed and on either side of him.

He knows she has on a t-shirt and panties.

He knows what he wants and knows what she wants:

"Yes. Too much?"

Even through the candlelight setting, Gibbs can see the concern in her eyes and he is touched by it:

"Just right."

Slowly, he kisses Ziva and instantly she leans forward, practically begging to be closer to his body. Her fingers thread through his hair, pulling him as close as she could. Her thighs tighten around him, wanting to feel alive again.

Jethro's hands go under his shirt, the one encased on her body, and a very audible moan is heard from the woman sitting on his lap.

Make that straddling.

Deciding enough was enough, Gibbs picked her up and moved them both of the couch. His lips swallowed her mew of pleasure no doubt from the recent movement.

By the time they had entered the bedroom, Gibbs was shirtless and Ziva was quickly catching up.

Whispered words and gasps from surprise and enjoyment were heard they entire way up the stairs.

Setting her down on the bed, Gibbs opens his eyes and breaks the kiss. Ziva looks up at him, and can't believe how sexy he is shirtless.

Her hands reach out and trace his chest, her nails slowly dragging a path all the way down until they hit the top of his pants.

Making the move to begin to un-buckle his belt, Gibbs' hands still hers by covering them with his.

Shaking his head 'no', he places her hands by her sides then lets them go. His hands fill with her straight dark tresses, and he lays her back on the bed, following her all the way.

Arms balancing his weight on either side of her head, his lips return to her throat while her hands stroke up and down his back in a pattern that only turns Jethro on more.

As Zivas legs come up to wrap around Gibbs and bring him closer, it dawns on her that there is more clothing on their bodies than she would have liked.

And apparently, he had the same thought.

Fingertips grazing a path down to her hips, Gibbs eagerly takes her camisole off over her head. She had it on beneath his dress shirt and once its gone, he finds she's left in a leopard print bra.

Leopard?

"Animal print?"

His tone say he likes, but is curious. So Ziva answers honestly:

"Felt like a change."

Her words are practically whispered out due to her lack of breath. Gibbs smirks at her comment and takes her breasts in his palms and Ziva's body instantly arches toward his hands, well-knowing she's begging for more.

And Gibbs would give, they both knew that.

Smiling at the reactions he was getting from her, he kisses her passionately, but wants more.

Reaching around to find the clasp, he breaks their kiss so he can speak:

"Like it,"

Taking off her bra completely, he throws it to the side of the room, someplace where it will be long forgotten in their leaps of passion:

"Like it even more now."

Ziva smiles and takes her hands south, quickly un-buttoning and un-zipping his pants.

Doing the same to her, he found something.

And it was rather interesting:

"Ya got a matching set."

Her panties were leopard as well and at his statement, she laughs generously. Gibbs smiles back at her before kissing her until she thought she would absolutely melt.

Before either one knew it, they were completely naked and the emotion of the moment truly began to set in.

Their actions still and look is shared. A look that expresses more than words can say. Ziva knows he cares about her and would always be there for her.

That feeling was mutual.

Slowly entering her, the eye contact stays and their dance begins. Every time he entered, he went so slow Ziva thought she might lose her mind.

Gibbs didn't want this time to be over quick, he wanted her to get what she wanted.

Things went slowly, fingers grasping, mouths finding, urges quickening.

Ziva was close, they both knew it. But she was going to hold on until Jethro was right there with her.

During her trip away from him, she longed for his touch during the nights alone.

Gibbs could feel his control slipping and he knew Ziva well enough to know she was holding on.

For him:

"Ziva?"

She looks at him wanting to know what was on his mind, though the actions he was performing kept her from organizing coherent thoughts. He spoke again:

"Fall apart."

And she did, screaming his name the entire way. He followed her over the cliff they had created together and would swear he would never get tired of having her all to himself.

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Lying together after their recent exercise, Ziva felt that she was truly home. The way she had opened up to Jethro once they started dating was surprising, even to her.

She held nothing back and honestly, she felt like she didn't have to.

She loved being able to feel safe with Gibbs at all times. There wasn't a single thought in her mind that she was ever in danger when he was around.

Loved.

That was a word she and Jethro had never used. Now they had kept things casual, but after a certain point in a relationship, you expected to hear that word.

Right?

Or was she wrong?

She really didn't know.

Throughout her thought pattern, her body had tensed and her back had turned from boneless to rigid in a matter of seconds.

Lying front to front, Gibbs both saw and felt the change:

"You're tense."

Ziva didn't want to lie to him, but she didn't want to tell him the truth either. So she tried to settle on something…neutral:

"Just thinking about things."

That was something truthful, right?

Gibbs felt the need to push her on the topic, at least that was what his gut was telling him. However, she had just been on her first case since the funeral.  
He decided to put it on hold.

For now.

Pulling her into him and kissing the top of her head:

"There's ever anything ya wanna say, I'm always here."

Ziva smiled.

Nodding into his chest, she knew what he said was true.

And maybe that could be enough.

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**Well? :)**


	4. Chapter 4

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**Author's Note: I'm sorry for the delay! I got a new job recently and things have been shuffled around, but here is Chapter Four! I really wanted a chapter with snow, so here it is. Spoilers for NCIS S10E14 "Canary". You are warned! I know this chapter is smaller, but the next one will be bigger, promise. :) Thank you to all of those who are stll reading/following tis story and the reviews have been a huge help!**

**Disclaimer: NCIS is not my property nor am I claiming them to be.**

**Summary: Gibbs is beginning to find a shocking discovery in Ziva. If she'll tell him, that is. **

**Rating: T (Perfectly safe!)**

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Their next case had Ziva, Gibbs, and Tony going undercover for a trick to get an Internet criminal.

Since Ziva was going with Tony for practically the entire case, they weren't going to see a lot of each other.

Maybe that was a good thing, maybe her getting some one-on-one time with DiNozzo would do her some good. Maybe it would get her back into the team aspect, remember who she was.

Not that she was doing a bad job, she was great as always. The last case she had been great at, as usual.

But something about her was still off while she was at work. The light behind Ziva's eyes still hadn't returned yet-despite best efforts by all.

When it was her and Jethro things went pretty well.

But he knew it would take a little time before she was back to full Ziva style with the team.

Tony had called her 'sexy' earlier.

Gibbs didn't like that.

But, as much as he hated to admit this to himself, it didn't piss him off.

Not really.

It signified that things were getting back to the way they were before and Ziva's quick response to the 'sexy' only confirmed that.

The case was important, all knew that. But so was Ziva getting the care she needed.

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Walking off the elevator and into the bullpen after driving back from Andrews Air Force Base with DiNozzo, David, and their Internet criminal. They knew where to take him, so Gibbs thought he would run up to the bullpen and check in on a few things.

He never expected to find McGee still there.

Crossing to stand in front of Tim's desk:

"McGee?"

He looks up, then at the computer screen again:

"McGee?"

Finally getting and maintaining eye contact with his boss:

"Boss?"

"What are you still doing here?"

"Boss do you think Ziva's ready? To be back I mean?"

Gibbs shuffles his feet slightly, then:

"She say something?"

"No-no boss. I just know that if what happened to her father happened to mine…I wouldn't be ready so quickly. And-and I know Ziva's strong but what if she's not strong enough for this?"

Gibbs took the stumbling and stuttering as a sign of care from Tim. Whenever he did that, it always concerned something important:

"McGee, she alone right now?"

McGee glances around, then back to Gibbs, confused:

"Boss?"

"Is she going through this alone? Is she locked away in her apartment?"

"No, she's at work."

McGee was beginning to see the picture. Gibbs continued:

"Right, she's at work. Getting back to normal."

Tim knew where Gibbs was going with this:

"So since she's back with us, she's ready?"

Tim wanted to believe his Boss, but sometimes you have to ask questions to assess doubts or fears:

"She's trying. Can't ask for more than that McGee,"

Gibbs walks off and says over his shoulder:

"Go home. Sleep."

McGee smiles and turns off his desk lamp before rising to leave.

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The snow had moved to the Navy Yard and it was coming down hard.

Quite hard.

Ziva is sitting on the concrete parking lot beside her car, on the ground, in the cold, without a coat.

Her hair is peppered with white flakes, showing how long she had been sitting there.

Her legs are stretched out in front of her, hands in her lap, shoulders slumped.

Her focus is not on the cold but on what is on her mind. When she buried her father it wasn't snowing, she had been in Israel, after-all. So sitting here in D.C., she had to look and admire what was falling down around her.

Falling down.

That seemed to be one of the things she had yet to do.

Fall down.

Maybe it was something she needed to do, more than want to do.

The concrete is cold on her bottom and the backs of her legs. But in this moment, she doesn't care. Staring out into space, remembering her past, thinking of the present, and picturing the future, the cold doesn't touch her.

She can vaguely hear someone speaking from a distance, though Ziva doesn't care right now.

Gibbs left NCIS to go home and upon entering the paking lot, he sees Ziva.

Ziva's sitting on the ground.

Ziva doesn't appear to be injuried.

Ziva doesn't have a coat.

Ziva is..not listening:

"Ziva,"

Gibbs speaks up, though he is not yelling. Upon receiving no response and walking closer to her, he tries again:

"Ziva."

His voice is firmer, stronger, trying to prove a point. Yet again, she makes no movement and shows no sign or clue of having heard him.

With the temperature drop and sitting on the ground coatless, it wouldn't take long before she fell ill. That was, if she hadn't already.

Standing beside her now, her head is at his shins and again, Ziva still sits staring out into the nothing of the cold D.C. weather and dark skies.

Worry starting to set in, he squats down beside Ziva and looks at her. She seems fine, just un-focused.

Treading carefully, Jethro reaches out and touches her shoulder, the one closest to him.

Ziva feels the weight on her shoulder and is temporarily brought out of her daze. Gibbs speaks again, much softer this time:

"Ziver,"

She turns to look at him and is astounded at the sight of blue that meets her after staring into darkness for so long. Gibbs tries again:

"Ziver, c'mon."

He has to get her dry, warm, off of the cold ground.

She makes no movement other than turning her head to look straight, as she was doing before.

Jethro tries another method.

Standing up, he moves his body behind hers. Bending slightly, Gibbs puts his hands under her arms and pulls her to her feet.

Though he doesn't like it. She's lighter than he thought she would be.

That is not a comforting thought.

Surprised she followed his lead so easily, Ziva merely stands in the position Gibbs has pulled her to.

And then-then she snaps out of it.

And fast.

Turning around to face him:

"Jethro! I was sitting and I…well it does not matter now does it?"

Her words began in a rush but quickly slowed down as her thought pattern furthered.  
Touching her shoulder again, her eyesight meets his as he speaks:

"It does matter. What's going on?"

Ziva smiles weakly and shakes her head while turning from him. Unlocking her car door she says:

"Don't worry."

She gets in her car, starts it, and leaves the parking lot, taking a right turn.

A right turn was Ziva's place, a left was Gibbs' house.

Gibbs car into his own vehicle, started it, and left the parking lot.

Turning right.

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**Well?**


	5. Chapter 5

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**Author's Note: Chapter Five! Thank you all for continuing to read/follow/review/favorite! :)**

**Disclaimer: NCIS is NOT my property.**

**Summary: Ziva is found-by Gibbs.**

**Rating: K (Perfectly safe!)**

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Walking into her apartment, Ziva shut the door behind her and walked into her living room. Looking around at all of her things and furniture, she realized that she wasn't as over her fathers death as she thought she was.

But she was supposed to be done with mourning.

She was supposed to be strong.

Unfeeling.

Tough.

Focused.

Fighting.

And most of all-

An NCIS Special Agent.

She wasn't supposed to fall down like this.

This was not the behavior of Ziva David.

She ran up her stairs two at a time and entering her bedroom she quickly grabbed her box.

Heading back downstairs and taking a picture off the wall, she stood across from her favorite spot and began throwing knives at her target. Taking every blade she had, she threw them at the multiple targets that normally lay hidden behind the photo she bought years ago.

Throwing at the targets so intently she didn't hear Jethro's car door.

She didn't hear the footsteps going up her walk.

She didn't hear him enter the doorway.

She didn't hear him close and lock the door behind him.

She did see him with her perpheial vision.

She did see him cross the room to stand in front of her.

And she felt Gibbs' hand close around her wrist, taking the knife from her with his free hand.

Putting the blade in his pocket Gibbs takes in her state.

Out of breath.

Soaking wet.

Cold to the touch.

Eyes flaring.

Arms shaking.

This was not a good sight.

Treading carefully, both hands go to her shoulders and turn her around.

Gently guiding her up the stairs in her apartment, he takes a right turn and upon entering a new room, turns on the bathroom light.

Ziva is moved to stand in front of the sink while Jethro turns on the shower and adjusts the temperature to one that would hopefully increase hers.

Her eyes seemed more calm, not nearly darting as much as they did when he first arrived. Speaking to her:

"Shower, warm up. I'll put fresh clothes on the counter."

He turns to leave the room, not touching her once, letting her change and shower.

Closing the door behind him he leans against it, thinking of calling Ducky. Deciding to wait on the phone call, he heads downstairs.

Downstairs to make tea.

Downstairs to wait.

Downstairs to come up with a plan.

Downstairs to hopefully figure out a way to gt rid of the worry that was causing some serious chest tightness.

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Stepping out of the shower, pulling the curtain back and grabbing her towel, she saw the neat stack of clothes Jethro had put on the counter for her.

Drying off and dressing, her hair had gone natural and full of curl. Looking at herself in the mirror, Ziva decides to leave it natural before turning off the light and heading downstairs.

Entering her kitchen, she sees Gibbs sitting at the head of the table with a cup of what she could only assume was coffee.

Across from his seat was a plate of food leftover from the night before, now re-heated, and a coffee cup.

Gibbs hears her enter and looks up at her:

"Good shower?"

_Good shower Jethro, Really?_

His own voiced yelled at him inside his head.

Ziva nods slightly and takes the seat that Gibbs has set for her:

"I'm fine. I was…temporarily un-focused earlier and that was un-proffessional of me. The snow…just…it never snows in Israel. And since my recent trip there…I was thinking. I am fine Jethro."

The food goes un-touched, the tea un-sipped.

Gibbs had seen this type of behavior from Ziva before. And since they had been in a relationship he was glad to say he was seeing less of it.

But now, the guarded look in her eyes, the defensive body language, the immediate mention of professialism and work-the walls were back up and in full force:

"You're fine?"

"Yes, I am."

Her hands in her lap, her face like a stone. Jethro kept going:

"You were sitting in a snow storm in a parking lot without a coat on staring into space."

"Yes, I was. I was thinking of my father and Jackie Vance. My focus was not on my surroundings at the time."

Gibbs nods and takes a drink of his tea, coffee wasn't what he wanted tonight:

"What were you thinking about your father?"

Ziva looks at him, eyes wide with surprise.

That was not a question she had been prepared for:

"That I was…am foolish for..for mouring a man who never loved me. That his death I had a rather large hand in. Along with Mrs. Vance."

Gibbs looked at her and the last sentence was a whisper.

He flashes back to when he and Tony saw Ziva and Ducky in Autopsy. He told her to _'go be fine, just not here.'_

When his sentence had come to its end, his voice softened. The look in her eyes, like the one he saw now, was startling. She was clearly going through something that Ziva didn't quite know how to express:

"Eat,"

Still not touching the plate in front of her, Ziva merely shakes her head 'no'. She hadn't felt an appetite since the whole ordeal began and that hadn't changed in the last five minutes.

Ziva can feel his glare upon her skin and it doesn't shake her:

"Ziver, ya need to have something on your stomach."

"Did you mean what you said?"

Ziva's sudden change of subject caused Gibbs to have to think for a moment. Though he quickly caught up:

"What did I say?"

She smiled:

"Earlier…you said _we_ were going to handle this? The night I baked the cookies."

Gibbs nods, the conservation jumped back at him:

"Damn straight I meant it. Where ya going with this?"

Gibbs was curious. Ziva explained:

"Then I have a question before we go any further. You say we are going to handle this together and…if that is the case I have to know something,"

Jethro nods.

And Ziva…well Ziva had to ask what she never thought she'd have to:

"Why don't you love me?"

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**Tell me what you thought? :D :D**


	6. Chapter 6

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**Author's Note: Chapter Six! Thank you all for the reviews and I know I left you on a bit of a cliffhanger last chapter, so maybe this one will help the suspense. ;) Thank you for reading and hopefully this was worth the wait!**

**Disclaimer: NCIS is NOT my property.**

**Summary: A question deserves an answer. Especially Ziva's. Will Jethro find an answer?**

**Rating: T (Implied themes, nothing graphic, I promise) :)**

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Gibbs' head was spinning.

_"Why don't you love me?"_

He'd been asked that question before but when he did, he'd had no problem answering.

But now.

Now he was sitting across from the beautiful Ziva David.

_"Why don't you love me?"_

She'd asked.

He hadn't answered.

Jethro didn't know how to.

_"Why don't you love me?"_

How did he respond to that? How could he respond to that?

Gibbs had feelings for her, but…well he wasn't sure what those were. They had been together for a while and things had been great.

At work they were great and at home they were great.

_"Why don't you love me?"_

The question bounces back and forth in his head like a taunting ritual that had long been buried until recently.

And it kind of had.

His ex-wife was the last to ask that.

Until now.

Everything they had worked out wonderfully:

In bed, at work, days off, they'd been handling it well.

Vance didn't know and both Gibbs and Ziva were in agreement that the team didn't know either, though eventually they were going to have their suspicions-they were NCIS Special Agents.

_"Why don't you love me?"_

He still hadn't responded.

But Gibbs had to try:

"Why don't I love you?"

"Yes. It is a simple question, I would think it would have a simple answer,"

Gibbs simply looks at her, so Ziva keeps going:

"We have been seeing each other for a little more than two months. We have been sleeping together, working together, keeping it away from everyone. And at some point, I would think that…word would have come up.  
We have known each other for years and now…I am sitting here and I am wondering. What I have not done, what I have not said. I thought surely you would have fallen in love with me by now. Because I have fallen for you."

Gibbs literally felt the breath leave his chest at her words.

She thought this was her fault.

How in the Hell did she get that signal?

"Ziva, you haven't done anything wrong,"

Gibbs' gut was singing-and loudly.

Yes, the death of her father was hard on her, but there was something else going on beneath the surface as well:

"You really think I haven't said 'I love you' because of something like that?"

The concern in his voice was as thick as he was tall.

This, Ziva noticed:

"It has to be. Either I have not been what you want or you haven't fallen for me. Both of which are my fault. Just tell me which one and I…I don't know."

Her voice fails her and she absentmindedly plays with the cup of tea in front of her, she could see the kettle sitting on the stove.

Failure was not something Ziva was accustomed to, nor was it something she liked. So to entertain the fact that she could have failed at this-that was a whole new level of pain for her.

Gibbs' voice returns to the air:

"I know I haven't said it. Also know that you don't think you can be loved."

Jethro called Ziva out, with no warning whatsoever.

Ziva was an extreme talent all her own, however she was also so hard on herself all the time that things like 'love' were foreign to her.

Having the environment she did as a child, it made sense that it would be damn difficult if not impossible to believe that someone could truly and honestly care for her.

And only her.

No ulterior motives.

Hearing his words, Ziva didn't quite know what to say in response.

And the worst part was that he was right.

But how, she was un-sure:

"What makes you say that?"

Gibbs smirks, knowing this wouldn't be an easy conservation:

"You're so hard on yourself Ziver, it's hard for you to let people in,"

Gibbs gently takes one of her hands in both of his, tracing a small pattern with his fingertips. What he said next would most likely be the hardest thing for her to hear:

"But ya let me in a couple months ago. And now, your father's dead. People were out to get him and Bodnar killed him. You feel guilty because you think ya should've seen it coming,"

Ziva maintains eye-contact with Gibbs, though that was getting difficult.

He was right. About everything he had said so far.

And Ziva knew he wasn't done:

"You blame yourself for me not saying I love you. Which means you would end this and…lock yourself away from everyone. Again."

Gibbs now takes both of her hands in his and is glad she's still looking at him. Her eyes shine with confusion and tears. Her voice is slow and steady though:

"That gut of yours knows me better than I thought it did."

Her comment earns a small and genuine laugh from both parties and Gibbs is ready with a response:

"Yeah, I guess so."

Ziva nods and looks away:

"Jethro, I…how did you know that?"

"Didn't. I know you."

She smiles at that, he always was clever with a conservation.

They both knew he still hadn't answered her first question.

They both knew he would have to do so tonight.

They both knew what was at stake.

Ziva had an idea, but her own gut was already telling her that Gibbs wouldn't go for it. Though she gave it a shot anyway:

"I have an idea and I think this will be good for us,"

She pauses and looks back to him. He nods, telling her to continue:

"What about a trial separation? Now I feel certain that is not what you wanted to hear but you are un-sure of whether or not you love me. At least it seems that way. Maybe by each of us giving the other a break, maybe that will help you decide."

She was right.

That was not what he wanted to hear.

But if it was what she wanted, he would do it:

"This what you want?"

Gibbs' voice was soft and that scared Ziva slightly:

"I think it will be best for both of us right now."

He nods, then has a question:

"How long?"

That, Ziva hadn't thought about yet, so she pulled a number out of thin air:

"Three weeks from today we will meet at your place and talk. Okay?"

No.

Not okay.

Not okay at all.

Gibbs felt that if he agreed to this he would be losing Ziva somehow. Never did he want that to happen.

But he knew what he had to say:

"Okay."

Slowly, tenderly, he takes each of her hands and kisses them lightly, one after the other. Then Gibbs lets them go and rises, to which Ziva does the same.

Walking to her door to leave, he turns toward her, puts his hands on her shoulders and kisses her forehead before letting her go and saying through a voice filled with emotion an richness:

"Three weeks."

She nods and forces a small smile.

Gibbs un-locks and opens the door, leaves, and closes it lightly behind him.

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Entering his house, Gibbs had never felt this bad in a very long time.

He had just gotten Ziva back and now it felt like he lost her all over again.

Leaning back against his front door, Gibbs looks around glad he left one light on when he left this morning. Taking off his coat and suit jacket together he tosses them across the room, not caring where they landed.

Making his way across the house, he descends the basement stairs, turns on the light, and tosses his car keys onto the work table.

Looking at the bottle of bourbon and the boat, he wasn't feeling either right now.

He also wasn't feeling very positive either.

This 'trial separation' didn't leave a good feeling in his gut. Not at all. But Ziva was a strong woman and if this is what she thought was best, Gibbs would give it a shot.

Even though he didn't want to be without her.

Which brought him back to the question of if he loved her or not. That was a question that deserved the right answer and Gibbs couldn't screw it up either way.

Sitting in-between the ribs of his boat, he could honestly say he had never been this worried before.

Scratching his head, Gibbs decides to give up on the basement and makes his way upstairs.

And upstairs all he found after he changed into pajamas was a couch.

And that is where he would toss and turn and get barely any sleep, his thoughts of Ziva and his feelings running rampant through his mind.

All night long.

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**Does he love her? What do you think? ;)**


	7. Chapter 7

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**Author's Note: Here is Chapter Seven! I know shorter chapters have been posted, so I decided to make this one as long as I could. :) Also, I added in and created a case of my own for the story-line. But don't worry, Chapter Eight will get the cases back to normal. Spoilers for Season Five Episode "RECOIL". You are warned! Reviews for the last chapter were very few, so maybe I have left you something to write about in this one. :) Thank you all for reading!**

**Disclaimer: NCIS is NOT my property.**

**Summary: The Trial Separation is on. But how is it changing Gibbs and Ziva?**

**Rating: T (Small amount of implied themes, very small.) :)**

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Cases came and went.

Warrants were ordered and used.

Evidence was collected and processed.

Bodies were brought in and autopsied.

And the team could tell there was something different with Gibbs and Ziva. McGee, Abby, and Tony all three discussed it and none of them could truly figure out what they thought, though they did have lot of theories.

Ducky told them not to worry, though they were all worrying anyway.

Gibbs was quieter than usual and Ziva didn't find anything funny anymore. DiNozzo would try to get a rise out of her and she would have none of it. The work was done of course and it was done well.

But the humor, the light behind the eyes of both Gibbs and Ziva-was gone.

Abby tried her best to change that, her happiness and smiles fell even more upon Gibbs and David.

Ziva had been asked to dinner and a movie, shopping trips, lunches, and concerts by Abby-all of which she had denied availability to.

Gibbs had Abby's company some nights while he was working on his boat. She would bring food and they would talk sometimes, sometimes not.  
Truth be told, he didn't mind her company.  
Abby knew when to try to get him to talk and she knew when to leave him be.

But whether Abby was around or not, it didn't matter.

Gibbs was only thinking about one thing.

Ziva.

Whenever the word 'love' came around, he instantly clammed up. Loving someone meant opening up to them, embracing them in every sense, and accepting that bad things could happen.

Not only had Gibbs seen enough bad happen to the ones he loved, but Ziva was without a doubt one of a kind.

In more than just one sense.

She was wonderful at her job, honest and caring in everything she did, and she understood about Shannon and Kelly.

When Gibbs had sat her down and the conservation had come around to them, Ziva listened to what he had to say. True, she knew the story already.

She profiled him for Ari.

But he still wanted her to know certain things and she listened, even had a few questions of her own.

Ziva would do well opening up about a strong variety of things. But when it came to Ziva's family, she never opened up and on the rare occasion she did, there was never much information she would share.

And though Gibbs didn't blame her for that, he did wish she would let go and open up about some of the things she never spoke about.

Like her father.

And her sister.

And her brother.

And her mother.

There was definitely a theme to what she kept hidden away.

Gibbs always made sure that Ziva knew that even though she didn't talk about things, she could always go to him.

And he would always listen.

So now, Gibbs was the one who needed to listen.

To his own damn self.

Looking back over the years they had together, he could honestly say some of the best times he'd had were with Ziva.

So now, standing in his basement alone after Abby had dropped off food for him and stayed for a few minutes, he grabs his cup of coffee and looks at the just more than half finished boat.

The evenings without her at home with him had been Hell.

The mornings waking up without her had been Hell.

These recent days had not been enjoyable at all. And it sounded odd, because he did see her at work. But that just wasn't the same.

He couldn't hold her at work.

He couldn't kiss her at work.

Those were the things he missed, among many others.

Something violently ripped him away from his thoughts unexpectedly was the un-mistakable shrill of a ringing cell phone.  
Turning around he puts the coffee cup down at the table and picks up the cell, answering without looking at who it is:

"Yeah Gibbs?"

McGee was on the other end, wanted to know if Gibbs wanted to go out for a beer with him, Palmer, and Tony:

"Staying in tonight McGee, thanks for the call."

They said their goodbyes and when Gibbs turned around to face the boat again, he knew it was going to be another long night.

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He left.

Leroy Jethro Gibbs touched her shoulders, kissed her forehead, whispered '_three weeks_', and left.

Left Ziva standing there in her own apartment.

The apartment she rarely went to now that she and Jethro were seeing each other.

He left because she came up with the idea.

And what a stupid idea!

Three weeks, who the Hell made periods of time for three weeks?

Turning, Ziva makes her way into the kitchen and turns off all of the downstairs lights. Going upstairs, she finds her hand wraps, changes clothes, and leaves.

Getting in the car, she had never been more grateful for the NCIS gym than she was right now.

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Looking in the basement and not finding what he was looking for, Gibbs crosses the room. Digging through his shelves of old tools he finds old case file boxes.

Some held memories of Shannon and Kelly, others files, and some held the woodworking tools he rarely used. Selecting a box with tools he carries it with him and uses the bottom of the boat as his table.

Placing the lid to the side, he thumbs through envelopes and pictures from his years as a Marine and ones of him and his dad.

Seeing the tool he needed in the bottom, he reaches for it.

But Gibbs feels something else as well.

A picture had been pinned between the tool and the side of the box, so Gibbs grabs both.

The picture.

The picture takes his breath away and his mind runs through a mile-a-minute race down memory lane.

It's the Thanksgiving dinner Ducky hosted three years ago.

Abby suggested that before the turkey was carved that a family photo should be taken. Ducky thought it was a wonderful idea and enlisted McGee's help in setting up the timer and tri-pod for his camera.

All were a little amazed the Duck man had such a nice camera.

Insisting that Ducky be in the middle, Abby organized the group, all at the head of the table.

Looking at the photo from the left, there's Tony, Abby, Ducky, McGee, Gibbs, and Ziva. Abby has hooked arms with both Ducky and Tony and Tim has one hand on the shoulder of both Ducky and Gibbs.

Then there's Ziva.

Ziva's not looking at the camera and Gibbs could honestly say this photo was one where he was giving a genuine smile.

He'd gotten there late but it had been a wonderful night filled with wine, great food, and laughter.  
Smiles are on all faces but Ziva is looking at Gibbs.

Gibbs remembers standing there, he remembers he put his hand on McGee's back and the other on Ziva's waist, pulling her in for the picture.

But was it really for the picture?

He'd owned this snapshot of happiness for three years and this was the first time he had really looked at it.

She was looking at him.

Dressed in red, she had a small smirk on her face, even from the side Jethro could tell. He loved her in red, it suited her so well. So fierce, strong, bold, she was a lot to handle.

And Gibbs had been the lucky one handling her for almost three months.

But if they were on a trial separation, what the Hell did that mean?

And that's where the problem en-lied.

He was supposed to know what that meant, how he felt, and what to do. He did know not having her around was something he didn't want to ever do again.

Deciding to put the boat on hold, Gibbs takes the photo and goes upstairs. Not having a frame, he puts it on the mantle above the fireplace, leaning it against a book so it would stand on its own.

And though nothing had been figured out, Gibbs did feel a little bit better.

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The next case they had caused more than a few problems. It was relatively simple, their main suspect had no alibi and the evidence was overwhelming.

But with anything that is important, there are struggles along the way.

Gibbs, Ziva, Tony, and McGee had a new lead which took them to a house in a very quiet neighborhood.

They were trying to track down a man named Kyle Annett, who was believed to be the final piece in the case. The suspect sang like a canary once in Interrogation and said Annet was who they really needed.

Gibbs took Tony with him, letting Ziva and Tim have the back.

Upon entering the house, all going in different directions, the three gentlemen called out clear.

Ziva didn't.

Finding Annett in the bedroom, her gun was knocked out of her hand and a fight ensued.

Ziva was fighting a grown man, well built and more than six feet tall. The team knew she didn't call clear and heard the scuffling upstairs.

Gibbs lead Tony and Tim, his heart without a doubt beating clear out of his chest.

This was the risk they took everyday.

This was the job they held.

This was the life they lead.

This was scary.

Plain and simple.

Entering the bedroom, Gibbs saw Annett lying on the ground. Glass was everywhere and Ziva's gun lie abandoned in the far corner.

Ziva was beneath him.

He saw this same sight five years ago, when Ziva went undercover.

And almost died:

"ZIVA!"

Gibbs knows McGee and Tony have his six and when he yells the two agents behind him share a look.

A look that Gibbs couldn't see.

But it was a look that said: _'If Boss is reacting like this, this is worse than I thought.'_:

"What?!"

Ziva' voice was refreshing to say the least. Her tone was annoyed and frustrated, but not one that said she was in physical pain.

Holstering his gun, Gibbs crosses over and begins to get Annett of her:

"He is not dead, I kicked him in a tender area."

He nods and having moved Annett fully off of her, Gibbs gains and maintains eye-contact with Ziva. She's not bleeding anywhere and she's already beginning to stand up. He takes her by the elbows and helps her get upright. The moment is lost when Tony speaks:

"Well done David. Good to see you still have those Mossad skills handy. Hey McBored, wanna help me here?"

Tim crosses the room, motioning to the glass while looking at Ziva:

"What broke?"

"A glass vase."

Tony and McGee get Annett standing, though he's grumbling in pain the whole way. They cuff him and now the party of five was ready to leave.

Gibbs wanted to get her to Duck, wanted her to be checked out anyway:

"Let's go."

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The ride back to NCIS was cramped for the men in the back, but Ziva was quiet in the front seat.

Too quiet.

Arriving at NCIS, Gibbs joined McGee and Tony to take care of Annett, saying Ziva needed to fill out her paperwork.

Around fifteen minutes later the three musketeers entered the bullpen.

Tony sits behind his desk and McGee does the same. Gibbs however has a different plan.  
Standing in front of Ziva's desk, he notices she's hiding her right hand, letting it hang by her side.

The left is typing something on her computer:

"Yes Gibbs?"

Feeling his glare on her skin, she looks away from the computer and to him:

"Conference room."

He walks away, heading to the elevator. While Ziva follows, feeling the curious eyes of Tim and Tony on her the whole way.

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Ziva enters the elevator and Gibbs puts them into motion. Waiting a moment, he pulls the emergency stop and turns to face her:

"Ya okay?"

This is what he wanted to talk about?

Really?

"I am fine Gibbs."

That was her automated answer. And even in the light of the elevator before he made them stop, he could see bags under her eyes.

She hadn't been sleeping:

"Right,"

He didn't believe her and his tone held nothing back. Reaching out, he takes her right hand in his, carefully inspecting it. Finding that her palm held the injury, no doubt from the broken vase she had mentioned at the scene:

"This 'fine' too?"

Ziva found a response and quickly:

"It is just a scratch."

The 'scratch' she was referring to would need about three stitches, but left up to her she would more than likely ignore both the pain and the need for stitches:

"Duck's gonna see to this. You're not sleeping."

"Is that a statement or a question?"

Gibbs lets go of her hand and looks at her. Making a bold move, his hands cup her face as he looks down into her eyes. His voice is soft:

"Ziver…"

Her instinct was to lean into his touch, but she decided against it:

"Jethro?"

They were both so confused. Not having the other around was causing a problem and that needed to be fixed:

"Know you're not sleeping,"

Ziva would give anything to put her arms around him and be held by Gibbs again. But in doing that, the time they had worked away from each other would prove pointless and the real issue would not be solved. She had to be strong.

Gibbs continued:

"Miss you."

That was not what Ziva was planning on hearing:

"We only have a few more days. Then things will change."

And she was right.

No matter what his answer was, good or bad, things would definitely change.

And Gibbs knew she was right:

"Yep."

"My hand can be left alone."

"Nope."

Gibbs smirked, she always was a fighter. Resisting the urge to lean in and kiss her, he lets his hands fall from her face and moves to flip the switch.

Now going to Autopsy for her hand, Gibbs could only hope the next days would go by quickly.

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**Will Gibbs figure it out? :) **


	8. Chapter 8

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**Author's Note: Chapter Eight! I predict two more chapters, so please leave your reviews. :) Chapter Nine will be very revealing, I can promise! Thank you all for keeping up with this story, I really appreciate it! Also, Ducky makes an apperance in this chapter. :D :D**

**Disclaimer: NCIS is NOT my property, nor are any characters.**

**Summary: Gibbs and Ziva are tense. To which Ducky notices and has an idea of his own.**

**Rating: K (Perfectly safe!)**

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Entering Autopsy, there is no body on Ducky's table anymore. The one that was has since been moved to the freezer:

"Ah, Gibbs, Ziva. What a pleasant surprise,"

Donald has his suit jacket off and his suspenders are strong against his light blue button-up and patterned bow-tie. Standing between two autopsy tables with clipboard in hand, the look on the faces of the two Special Agents in front of him is not a good one:

"Though it seems that this isn't a pleasant circumstance."

Gibbs picked up where Ducky left off:

"Got an injured hand for ya, Duck."

Ducky sets his clipboard on the autopsy table to his right:

"Oh? I'm trusting the injury would belong to Ziva since you wouldn't come down here on your own for a simple hand."

The humor in Ducky's voice was heard and Ziva, well Ziva wasn't feeling too comical at the moment:

"Why would he? He loves holding himself to a less important standard than everyone else."

Ducky looks from Ziva to Gibbs, then back to Ziva:

"I see. Let me get the bag my dear. Hop up on the table and have a seat."

Ziva does while Ducky heads to his desk for the tools and supplies he would need. Gibbs didn't respond to the comment Ziva had just made, but he did follow her. He stands while she sits, their height difference seemingly non-existent from this position.

Ducky returns without the clipboard, setting out the tools he needed to Ziva's right:

"Which hand is it?"

Ziva shows him her right hand, not withholding the wound:

"It is just a scratch Ducky."

Starting the process to heal her injury, Ducky has nothing to say. Though Gibbs does:

"Not many scratches need stitches Ziver."

The air in the room was tense and Ducky knew this was about more than her hand.  
Ziva added to the dialogue:

"Not many scratches need escorts either."

"Yeah and ya received one of those so you'll receive stitches too."

These two were itching to fight and that was obvious. Ducky needed to explain what he was doing to Ziva:

"Ziva, I'm going to numb your hand for a moment and then I will be placing three stitches in your palm. Alright?"

Ziva looked to Ducky and nodded. She knew this wouldn't hurt, Ducky wouldn't hurt someone if he had to. In many ways, she was lucky to know Donald Mallard.

Silence filed the room and she didn't like it. So she stopped it. Her voice was rushed and obviously frustrated:

"It was a fight. I made it into the bedroom and when I saw him the gun was knocked out of my hand. We struggled and in the process a vase was broken an-"

"And you got hurt!"

His interruption and slightly raised voice caused even Ducky to stop what he was doing. It was always surprising when Jethro revealed emotions like that.

Ziva's head moves and she looks at him, meeting Gibbs' already waiting eyes.

It was not a serious injury, it was only a few moments of true pain. But it was enough to scare the Hell out of Gibbs.

Ducky begins his work on her hand again and Ziva looks away.

But Gibbs wasn't done:

"Ya got hurt. Nobody had your six. Ya went up there _alone."_

His tone changed with his last sentence and it told Ziva that he was indeed worried. So she spoke:

"And until my fathers death, you have never had a problem with me entering a scene alone."

Ducky knew where this was going and he had an idea. Officially done with the stitching, he covers his work in gauze and tapes everything in place. Hearing Jethro beginning to respond, Ducky rises from is seat and moves to the Autopsy doors:

"You're never supposed to go alone. I kn-"

"Enough."

Though Ducky didn't raise his voice, the sudden speaking did cause both Gibbs and Ziva to lok his direction.

Hitting the button that automatically closes and locks the doors, Ducky also makes the DO NOT ENTER flash in red above the doorway.

They were on his turf now.

Ducky begins as he slowly walks back to them:

"The two of you have been putting this team through more worry than even I thought possible. Especially considering neither one of you are undercover or seriously hurt or in Mexico,"

Ducky reaches his standing position between both of them and is far from finished:

"Now although I don't know what EXACTLY is going on here, one thing is obvious: something is straining each of you. In your own individual and unique ways, your behaviors have changed. The cases are still the main focus, of course, that hasn't changed.  
But something IS going to happen. And it's going to happen right now.  
The three of us will remain in this room until whatever needs to be said, is said or whatever needs to be done is done. Now, who is going first?"

Ducky wheels over a near-by stool and takes a seat, looking at Gibbs and Ziva, waiting for an answer.

Gibbs shares a look with the lady seated on the autopsy table to his right. Unsure of what to say, Ziva speaks for them both:

"Ducky, although the gesture is sweet, it is un-necessary. Everything is fine."

Ducky nods to Ziva, then looks to Gibbs:

"Would I be correct in assuming that she said the same thing about her hand?"

Gibbs chuckled.

And nodded.

Ziva looked from one man to the other and had the feeling she wasn't getting through to either one.

But Ducky was right. And he still had more to say:

"I know you believe that to an extent Ziva, but something has happened between the two of you. And the people who care about you are getting worried. So what's going on?"

Gibbs looked at Ziva for a while before she looked at him.

Gibbs and Ziva knew they couldn't tell Ducky.

Not the entire truth anyway.

They were so close to the end of their separation, so close to actually having the discussion they needed to have.

Gibbs and Ziva needed to discuss it with each other before they told anyone. Because right now, they didn't even know what to tell and what to keep to themselves.

But Ducky was a friend and he deserved an answer, not to be lied to.

Ziva looked at Ducky and gave it her best shot:

"Ducky, you are right. Something has happened between us. And we…are not sure where it is going. So I am not sure how to answer you."

Gibbs saw her lower her head, not certain of how to proceed. Gibbs grabbed the leftover reins of her comments and added a few of his own:

"Don't worry Duck. We know you're here."

Looking at Gibbs, Ducky sensed that was all the information he was going to get:

"No Jethro. That's not good enough. How long have you two been seeing each other?"

Ziva's head snaps up, looking to Ducky, then Gibbs-then…well then the floor. Un-sure of what to do, she looked back to Gibbs.

Gibbs could see the look in her eyes and it was one he didn't like. Speaking to Ducky after placing his hand on Ziva's shoulder:

"Almost three months."

Ziva broke eye contact and found that the shoes she was wearing deserved some attention.

Well that and that she didn't know what to say.

But, as usual, Ducky did:

"And I'm guessing there has been some difficulty? Ziva, there is nothing to feel bad about. If I know you like I think I do, you're already blaming yourself for whatever is happening,"

Ziva looks at Ducky, still surprised at how fantastic he was at reading not only people, but her as well. He continues:

"Are you two trying to work things out?"

Ziva nodded, there was no use in holding that piece of information from him at this point.

Looking at the two, obviously in love, individuals in front of him Ducky had a feeling. What Gibbs would call his 'gut' was telling him something strong, and it was something that needed to be said:

"You two obviously care about each other. So I trust that each of you will do your best to fix whatever is going on. However, I would request that the team be kept in mind. We all care for the both of you."

Ziva felt a sudden severe wave of guilt crash over her from all sides.

Even if she had to, she couldn't form a response for the Medical Examiner in front of her.

Gibbs saw her body tense. And Gibbs eliminated the silence from the room:

"We will Duck. Rule 45."

Ziva smirked and raised her head, looking to Ducky:

"Clean up your own mess."

They all shared a genuine smile, well-knowing the rules would out live them all.  
Ziva knew the conservation had come to a close and sensed the need to leave.

Scooting closer to the edge of the table, she motions to hop off of the autopsy table.

Gibbs, seeing her intent, intervened.

Positioning himself in front of her with his back to Ducky, he planted his feet.

Well-knowing Ziva wouldn't want the help, Gibbs was going to make damn sure she would get it anyway.

Ziva looks up.

And has nothing but a glare for Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

She injured her hand, her palm to be exact.

And he was preventing her from helping herself.

All she was trying to do was get off of an autopsy table, for Peter's sake!

The glare was commented on:

"Glare all ya want…still helping ya down."

Ducky failed attempt at hiding a laugh was heard.

Giving in, Ziva nodded.

Gibbs stepped forward, now completely in front of her person. Putting his hands on her hips, Ziva carefully slid off of the table and onto the ground.

Once successfully on her own feet again, the three of them said their goodbyes while making the way to the doors. Jethro flipped the right buttons, causing the DO NOT ENTER to disappear and the lock to be dis-assembled.

Pushing the elevator button, the silver door opened to reveal Palmer:

"Gibbs, Ziva."

His smile served as his greeting, in addition to saying their names. Gibbs nodded while Ziva responded and smiled:

"Jimmy."

Palmer enters Autopsy while Gibbs and Ziva join the elevator.

Seeing Ducky cross the room to his desk, Jimmy asks through a concerned voice:

"Doctor, are Gibbs and Ziva alright?"

Ducky merely smiled, while he responded with the best truth he could give without revealing too much:

"They will be Mr. Palmer. If they listen to Rule number Eight, that is."

Turning to face Pamler who was now standing between the autopsy tables looking his direction, Jimmy wasn't quite sure what to say next.

So Ducky…well Ducky began another story.

And hopefully the next time he spoke to Gibbs and Ziva it would be of good news.

And wouldn't require them to be locked in be a Medical Examiner.

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**The next chapter will be the end of their Trial Separation! Thoughts?**


	9. Chapter 9

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**Author's Note: This is the next-to-last chapter! I know the updates have been taking a little longer and I do apologize for that! The next chapter will be an epilogue, so keep that in mind. :D Thank you all for keeping up with this story and hopefully you'll like this one! Please drop me a review and I will respond. :D Thank you!**

**Disclaimer: NCIS is NOT my property.**

**Summary: The three weeks are up.**

**Rating: T (To be safe. There is a kissing scene, but nothing too bad!)**

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Their time had run out.

The Trial Separation was over.

The three weeks had come and gone.

The ninth inning had started and it was time to play ball.

Today was the day.

Today Ziva was to meet Gibbs at his house and discuss if he knew if he loved her or not.

This was going to be emotional and honest and definitely truthful.

At least she hoped it was truthful.

And one thing she always said and felt Leroy Jethro Gibbs was, was truthful.

Parking in his driveway and killing the engine and lights, Ziva sat there for a moment thinking. A lot had happened in her life and as usual, it happened quickly.

She had fallen in love with her boss, her father had died, Jackie Vance had died, Bodnar was getting away, and in D.C., the possibility for heartbreak was higher now than it had ever been in her life.

So why had she willingly set this up?

And come up with this idea?

Set a time-table?

Not seen him outside of work in three weeks?

These three weeks had been straining in every sense of the word.

And now she was sitting in the drive-way of a man she was deeply in love with.  
Getting out of the car and closing the door lightly, she makes her way up his front porch stair and stands in front of his door.

Pausing for a moment, she takes a deep breath.

And opens the door.

Closing it behind her, she sees lights are on. Taking a few slow steps forward, her vision tells her that Gibbs is sitting on his couch. Setting the book he was reading to the side, Ziva also noticed a coffee-cup was keeping him company as well.

Just barely entering the living room, Ziva was un-sure of what to say.

But sarcasm was always there:

"I thought I would find you surrounded by sawdust and bourbon."

Looking at her, she seemed fine on the surface.

But Ziva David always seemed fine on the surface.

Gibbs noticed that her palm now only required a medium sized bandage. Her hand was getting better.

But was she?

"Thought I'd come up here,"

She looks at him as he continues:

"This is important."

Ziva nods and takes a seat in the green armchair at the end of his coffee-table:

"It seems you have had a decision to make."

Her intention was to leave the comment open-ended, to have him pick it up and run with it.

She was not disappointed:

"Yep. Made the decision."

Ziva did her best to mask her surprise.

The tone in which Gibbs had made both of his statement was one of calm and relaxation. It was as if he had told her the weather report for the next three days, it was that nonchalant.

But.

Then again.

It could simply be pure confidence in what his answer had told him. She knew Gibbs was serious and this was what he was like when his mind was made up.

At least she hoped so.

Ziva looks anywhere but to Gibbs.

Glancing around his house, she sees the same things. Which, she would be lying to herself if she said that wasn't a comfort.

Older t.v., piles of books on top of the mantle, the framed photo of the flag raising at Iwo Jima, and th-

Wait a minute.

Something was new.

Rising from the green chair and crossing to the other side of the room, Ziva gets a better look at the photo leaning against a pile of books.

Picking it up, she remembers it.

Ducky's Thanksgiving dinner.

Still looking at the photo, she speaks to Gibbs:

"I remember this night. You were late after getting rolls. Ducky was ready to carve the turkey and then you arrived. Which, after the toast, gave Abby the idea for a picture. Ducky and McGee got the camera set up and put the timer on. We all arrange ourselves, with Abby's orders, of course,"

Gibbs smirks and nods, he remembers it all as well.

But she's much better at telling the story:

"And she put us together. Whether or not it was intentional, I am still un-sure,"

Ziva puts the photo back in its spot and turns to face Gibbs:

"I was happy that night. Though that was three years ago. We were not together then and I…it does not matter,"

Her shoulders straighten, prepared for whatever came next. Though her strong stance did not hide her voice.

Not from him:

"What is your decision?"

Gibbs didn't want this to go this way, he wanted things warmer, calmer.

She wasn't on trial for capital murder, she was finding out if he was in love with her or not.

So he side-stepped her question, taking a different path:

"What doesn't matter?"

Her shoulders slump:

"Gibbs I am looking for an answer, not a new discussion about something I should not have said to begin with."

Gibbs had to admit, she didn't want to wait on the things that mattered:

"Remember that night too,"

Her eyes go to him, listening to him as he continued:

"Wasn't sure if I was going or not. Didn't really know if I wanted too,"

This surprised Ziva, his honest admittal. He kept going:

"But I thought it'd be a good idea. When that picture was taken, couldn't help but think about where I was. With my team, good food, arm around a woman I loved."

Her eyebrows involuntary rose at the word _'loved'_.

Then they lowered just as quickly as they had risen.

He didn't love her.

He did, but not anymore.

If Ziva was going to walk out of his door tonight, without his love, she was going to know damn well why.

And she wasn't going to be calm about it either:

"Loved. But no longer love. Is that what your decision is?"

Her anger was rising, along with her voice. Beginning to pace around the living room, she's far from done:

"So I leave to bury my father and I come back to hear that you, at one point in time, loved me? But now you do not, correct? Three years ago we went to Ducky's and you were in love with me then? Did you not think to tell me?! Did you not think I was _worthy_ of that piece of information?! Or was it not important enough to even be said, or…or brought up for that matter?!"

She was pissed.

Gibbs had been divorced three times and he knew when a woman was pissed off.

He also knew when not to interrupt.

If he wanted to live, that is.

He had to admit though, she was even more beautiful when she was fighting mad.

And this fighting mad woman was not done in her monologue:

"You have no idea how long I have loved you, do you?! Since Mike Franks, that's how long! Now I know Mike has passed away and you have my condolences for that, he was a wonderful man. But he…he had to take you away! He took you to Mexico! And you drank and got a tan and stopped cutting your hair…and that mustache! That mustache is not allowed to ever return,"

Gibbs smirked at that, knowing she hated the mustache was funny to him.

Though funny was the last think on Ziva's mind:

"So you come back to save me. And you did,"

Her voice enters a new level of calm, her pacing ceases:

"And since then I have been the agent, the tough one, the official Special Agent. Even your lover. And now I am being told that you do not love me. After all we have gone through. As a team, as man and woman, as human beings."

Ziva's emotion finally catches in her throat and she stops speaking. Looking him over one last time, she heads for the door.

But Gibbs isn't done.

Hell, he hasn't even responded yet.

Hearing the front door open, Gibbs is behind her and takes her by the shoulders gently. Turning her to face him and seeing her eyes full of emotion, both anger and hurt, he knows what he has to do.

Closing the front door behind her and leaning her against it, he takes an action that could quite possibly get him killed.

He kisses her.

Powerful.

Hard.

Strong.

Passionate.

And Ziva returns it without a second thought.

No holding back.

No fighting him off.

Nothing but force and passion is returned.

They stay like that for a few long moments, missing how they used to do this whenever they damn well wanted too.

When they finally broke away, both were breathless and more than a little surprised.

Gibbs says between breaths:

"Never said I didn't love you. Never said anything. But I know one thing. I know that not having you here is Hell. Know that waking up and going to bed alone is Hell. Know that I miss seeing you every morning in my bed. And by not having you here, I am in love with you. Have been. For a long damn time,"

Gibbs kissed her again, giving everything he had.

Breaking the kiss he says one more thing:

"Took me a second to realize how much you mean. To me."

Ziva looks at him.

And smiles.

Then she breaks out into a huge wave of laughter.

Gibbs, un-sure of what was so funny, had to smile at her and how the anger and hurt had left her eyes.

Giving her a quizzical look, Ziva explains:

"That is more than one thing,"

This time, they both laugh.

But Ziva has to know something:

"So you do love me?"

She was scared of the question.

She was scared of the answer.

He wasn't:

"Yes. Not gonna let you forget it."

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Through the night they had talked and kissed and gotten back to the normal they had before the trial separation.

Ziva knew Gibbs' true feelings and he knew hers.

Lying in bed together a few hours later, Ziva eyes go to the ceiling.

Thinking about what would happen when the team found out and how their lives would change, Ziva was filled with a mix.

Nervousness and relief.

An odd combination, no doubt.

Nervous of how the team would react.

But relieved that she had something to tell them.

Relieved that she wasn't alone anymore.

Relieved that the man she loved, loved her back.

And between all that and having the arms of Jethro Gibbs wrapped around her, Ziva was relaxed enough to get the best sleep she'd had in months.

The rest could wait until the morning.

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**Only one more chapter! **


	10. Chapter 10

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**Author's Note: Major Spoilers for S10 E24 "DAMNED IF YOU DO"! You are warned! Here is the last chapter of this story. For now. When Season 11 premieres, I will most likely add an additional chapter, when the mission Gibbs is on is explained better. But until then, this will be it for this story. Thank you ALL for reading and reviewing and for all you've done! **

**Disclaimer: NCIS is NOT my property.**

**Summary: Ziva and Gibbs, after Parsons has arrived.**

**Rating: T (Gets pretty heated in this chapter, but it is NOT M)**

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Ziva knew the second Richard Parsons walked through the NCIS doors, she wasn't going to like him.

Parsons had made his motives that he was out to get her.

But when the truth had found light, it was Gibbs he was truly after.

Gibbs, the man she loved.

Gibbs, the man who loved her.

Gibbs, the team leader.

Parsons was not getting Gibbs.

Not without one hell of a fight.

Ziva had first seen the cabin the day after Gibbs told her he loved her and she had to admit, she liked the cabin.

Though now, the cabin held a different meaning.

Instead of a place where she and Gibbs would go and try to forget all that was happening in their lives, it was now a place of hide-out.

Almost a place of shame.

Gibbs had been taken out of his world, his office, his life.

Richard Parsons had made damn well sure of that.

So Gibbs had left, and had been in the cabin ever since.

And that frustrated Ziva for more than one reason. Leroy Jethro Gibbs shouldn't have to hide, he should fight!

And Richard Parsons should not be the man to potentially take down Gibbs.

This was Gibbs we were talking about here.

And he had told the team to stay out of it, and he was holed up in a cabin, and he wasn't at work with his coffee, and none of it was okay with her.

Not a single damn bit of it.

The team meeting in the elevator hadn't exactly caused Ziva's spirits or thoughts to rise either. They all wanted what was best for Gibbs, that she knew. But she still got off the elevator feeling un-satisfied and guilty.

This _entire_ situation had been her fault and now Gibbs was paying the price for it.

The trip to Gibbs' cabin had gone horribly, her emotions had shown.

When she and Tony had gotten inside the cabin, Tony had been his usual self and was focused on the food. Ziva said she couldn't even think of eating at a time like that.

After she said that comment, she felt Jethr's eyes on her person.

Trying to gauge how she was handling this.

While Gibbs' lawyer rattled on and Ziva responded, she felt like she was trying to save a drowning man with her hands tied behind her back. From her point of view, the only thing Ziva David could think of doing was getting Gibbs out of the situation she felt that she had put him in.

Then the knock at the door with McGee's arrival of a case had spurred her out of her thoughts.

Ziva didn't want to leave Jethro, not now.

And that was what she said once McGee had shared the details of the murder he had. But when Gibbs looked at her and mentioned the victim's family, she knew Gibbs knew her well.

Later that same night, after the head of the body had been put in Autopsy and McGee and Tony had left, Ziva went back to the cabin.

She knew she would only have a few hours with Gibbs before she would have to leave to avoid suspicion, but she still wanted those few hours.

Knocking on the door, she only had to wait a moment before the door was opened. She could tell Gibbs had been awake and the fire was still going. So upon entering and hearing the door close softly behind her, she mentioned it:

"You are still awake, I see."

"Yeah, couldn't sleep,"

Ziva sits in the middle of the cot Gibbs had adopted for his bed and listens to him as he continues:

"Been thinking."

He's standing in front of her, adding to his height and taking away from hers:

"Nothing too serious I hope."

Gibbs smirks, somewhat relieved to see she's kept her sense of humor. He comments:

"Thinking about you."

Her eyebrows rise and her voice is low when she responds:

"I know this is my fault and I know I have to fix it. And I want you to know that I will. I just neede-"

Ziva is cut off with Gibbs' lips on hers. Gently placing his hands beneath her elbows, she gets the message and rises while Gibbs guides her to the wall.

Their kissing gains severe intensity as her back meets the wall. Hands go everywhere, tracing inches by inches of body.

Gibbs' fingers go beneath her blouse as he pulls her right leg up and around his waist, an action only drawing them closer together.

Feeling the need for breath Ziva breaks the kiss while Gibbs…well Gibbs has other plans. His lips go to her throat, her collarbone, leaving marks along the way.

Slowing down, he pulls away just far enough to look into her eyes, and he has a comment:

"Missed doing this."

Ziva gives a throaty laugh before she says:

"I see that. So have I."

His eyes sparkle in agreement with his smirk. But his next comment has a serious under-tone:

"It's not your fault."

Her eyes look away from his, staring and beginning to memorize the plaid pattern on his shirt.

She's still got her leg around his waist, still wanting him, and still feels that this whole situation is her fault:

"Yes it is. Had it not been for my…eagerness, you wouldn't be holed up here in the middle of nowhere!"

Gibbs could see, hear, and feel the frustration radiating off of Ziva right now. And he knew why it was bothering her so much. Ziva was used to blaming herself for everything that went wrong and this situation definitely fit that category:

"Not just Bodnar that's got Parsons hunting. And this is still not your fault."

Ziva could have said it was his words.

Ziva could have said it was the fact that it was the middle of the night.

Ziva could have said that it was the fact that she was surrounded and encased by something the man in front of her had built.

Hell, she could have even said it was the fact that she was practically outdoors.

But for some reason…

Ziva was insanely turned on.

And she could tell Gibbs was too.

Kissing him again prevented her from any thoughts about anything Gibbs had just said, hopefully distracting Gibbs from the conservation she knew he wanted to have and Ziva wanted to avoid.

Her plan?

It failed.

Gibbs breaks off her kiss and puts a small amount of distance between them while finding his voice:

"Ziva. Ziva,"

She looks at him through brown, hungry eyes, and she listens:

"I need ya to know that none of this is your fault. Nobody's fault. My decisions and I don't regret them."

She smiled and for real this time. She truly did love this man.

Nodding, the mood quickly returns to the level it was before.

And Ziva had to admit, something about making love against a cabin wall built by Leroy Jethro Gibbs was quite intense.

That night, Ziva left after they were together. She knew Gibbs' lawyer was to be there in a few hours and Gibbs needed sleep as well.

The next morning, Ziva McGee, and Tony arrived together and things…had not gone well.

At all.

They had evidence to weaken Parsons, evidence Gibbs had told them not to collect.

Naturally, Ziva was strong-willed and told Gibbs he couldn't do it alone.

And in response, Gibbs raised his voice and told her it was not her job. She let her emotions slip when the word 'family' came out of her mouth.

Exiting the cabin, she knows Tony is hot on her heels and a conservation with him was the _last_ thing she needed right now.

Shortly after that, Gibbs returned to NCIS and word of a new, highly dangerous mission had spread its way around.

To which, McGee, Tony, and Ziva all turned in their badges.

For Gibbs.

The leader.

The lover.

The coach.

The night she turned in her badge, she went to Gibbs' house and found him putting case files in the fire. Sitting across from him, she explained the mission and he explained what he had to do.

Neither one liked the risks that were posed for the other.

But they did understand.

They didn't spend the night together and the goodbye kiss they shared was passionate to say the least.

They would have very little contact over the next four months, but the communication they would have would be enough. They were strong and they could, and would, get through this.

Ziva and Gibbs could get through anything.

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**There it is, folks! :)**


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